File under 'not great tweets'

Over on Twitter quite good pop 'chanteuse' Lily Allen has confirmed that her forthcoming retirement is "retirement from writing, recording and touring under the name 'Lily Allen'". Well we're not going to lie, readers, this isn't exactly what we were hoping for. With any luck this will be a bit like in Se7en (and every other American film involving law enforcement) when Morgan Freeman was going to retire in order to sit around the house wanking all day or whatever it is people do when there'...

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