SPOILER ALERT: The Truth About Santy Claus

For those of you who don't know (this one goes out to you, Jessica Simpson), Santy Claus is simply a figment of the world's collective imagination and he does not exist in real life. You can thank UsWeekly for shitting on your holidays. Actually, you can thank the Gosselin kids, because they are destroying Christmas for everyone! Bars and crack houses will be overflowing with 4-year-olds this holiday season because of the Gosselins. Aunt Jodi's vengeful lips, I mean, "a source" te...

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